What to think?

I don't know what to think. A couple of weekends ago we wanted to have Jack's photos taken for his first birthday...of course he is the cutest kid ever, but when a camera gets on him in the sun, he squints and doesn't smile. I was super nervous about his photos turning out good. And I was nervous about how I was going to look.


I got the photos back today from the photographer. It made me want to cry. The first photo was of me holding Jack and my arms were disgusting. So fat and also looking like they were starting the cottage cheese look. And of course there weren't many photos that were great of Jack smiling either...which is a bummer. You pay good money and it doesn't turn out the way you wished.


I feel like I am smaller and I don't know what to think about that. Becuase when I see photos of myself it is a different story. What to do? I know what I need to do. I need to get my butt in gear. I need to exercise. I need to DO IT!!! On Pinterest I found this:

I printed this off and taped it to my desk. I am the worst with motivation. And i need to motivate myself because no one else will!

My main question is "How to get started?". I wish I had Tracy Anderson by my side all day long to train me and help me figure it out. She's an ass-kicker.

I am down to 176 just by eating better...which is good. 8 pounds down. But that isn't enough. I don't want to just eat better and slowly lose the weight. Been there, done that and it take months.
WORK IT OUT! It will HURT, it will take TIME, it will require DEDICATION, I will need to make HEALTHY decisions. It will require SACRIFICE. Iwill need to PUSH my BODY TO ITS MAX. There will be TEMPTATION, but I promise myself, when I REACH MY GOAL, it going to be WORTH IT! A*M*E*N.

Let that be my prayer to myself.

Going Going Going

So I am seriously proud of myself...maybe not for any weight loss...but for my house/cleanliness! One of my goals for 2012 was to be generally 'better' at stuff! Meaning, anything! I know it's genaric but there were so many things in my life that I was just lazy and careless about. And I needed to pay more attention.

One huge thing in my life and my families life was the cleanliness of our hosue. I have always thought of mom's and friend's of mine who always have their house so clean and thought 'how in the heck do they do that'? Well, I'm attempting it and doing good.

One of my things has been keeping my kitchen clean. Now, it has been failing (sort of) this past week, but in general I have been doing pretty well! And trying to keep the living room and Jack's room clean. The only downside is that there are still so much clutter going on everywhere. Maybe I have the 'Spring Cleaning' bug. But I am so tired of all of the extra crap. I took a day off of work on Monday and I spent a solid 4 hours cleaning out our master bedroom and bathroom. I know. A lot. But our room had not been seriously clean since we moved into the house 4 years ago. What??? you say. It's true. Evan and I both had been bad about throwing stuff away and organizing the house. But now it's changing!! I am bound and determined to get it all out! Get out the stuff that we don't need. No more of this 'maybe I think someday i'll use it'. It's gone. I'm done. Trash it. Just throw it away or give it to Goodwill. And looking at it all...I really am stupid for thinking about keeping things. Why did we have a box of unopened towels still from our wedding behind the chair in our bedroom. OPEN IT and put the towels away. Why did I have 4 empty tampon boxes in the cabinet under my sink. Why did Evan have 3 old cologne bottles just sitting on his counter taking up space? We aren't hoarders....but I it somedays seems close. But step one of the clean bedroom and bath room is done!

For this, I am proud of myself. At this point, I probably need 2 more days kid and husband free to clean out the rest of the house. But I'm moving forward. Hazahh! (next to tackle our guestroom closet...thowing away bags of old tissue paper is going to be hard for me).

On the note of my weight loss. I have lost 2 pounds....down to 178. (maybe less becuase I was wearing clothes, lol). I have a nail appointment on Saturday afternoon. So hopefully I will weigh myself on Saturday and I will see 175. That's my first goal. Wish me luck.

:)

March

I thought that I would keep this up pretty often. Maybe this time I will...at least for a short time period.

It seems like every thing in life is moving really quickly right now. Jack is starting to walk. AHH...and we are always going, going, going. However, my house tends to look like a pig sty. Keeping, sort of, my new years resolution to just do better (at everything). I have kept my kitchen pretty clean consistantly. And for me, that's a big deal. But I'm the queen of being lazy and just 'moving things around'...as Evan says. My kitchen and living room look good, but don't go in my room or bathroom...and don't you dare look in any of the closests. Sad.

My big thing right now, besides my crazy pinterest projects. Is trying to get in better shape/loose the remaining baby weight.

Before I got pregnant I was comfortable where I was (althought I'd like to have lost a little more).

Here are all of my stats:
Height: 5' 8"

High School Weight: 150
College Weight: 155
2 Years In To Marriage: 185
(Lost about 25 pounds at one point)
Weight When I Got Pregnant: 164
Highest Baby Weight: 204 (ICK!!)
Current Weight: 180

I started to get into more of a 'weight-loss' frame of mind, mildly, in January. And I had lost 5 pounds. So my current weight is 180. My best goal is 150. My realistic goal is 160.

I've heard that if you set small goals and rewards for yourself it helps. Here are mine:
175: Get Nails Done
170: Buy New Jeans
165: Buy New Swim Suit
160: Spend $100 on new clothes for myself (not that I will need new fitting clothes, i just NEVER shop for myself)
155:
150:

I have not set goals for 155 or 150...mainly because I'm not sure what I would do. And if I will get there.

I would love to be at 160 by the first weekend in June. Which is 2 1/2 months. I am not sure that will happen. 20lbs in 2 1/2 months. Eek.

I'm going to try to log all of my accomplishments and what I'm doing. Currently I am obsessed with weighing myself every day. I am going to try to stick with each Monday.

Wish me luck!!!